Nico was my teacher today. I didn't plan it that way, but that is the nature of a great adventure...serendipitous life lessons. Actually I went out to teach him how to be a dog, but in the process he taught me something even more important.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. First let me introduce Nico to you. As you can see Nico is a full-blooded Miniature Collie, better know as a Sheltie. His problem is that he doesn't know that he is a dog...hasn't been around other dogs much and definitely prefers the company of human beings. (I have just the opposite problem!) On our adventures he clings to my legs like a pair of leg warmers, and given his luxuriant fur, he could well be just that. The other dogs are leaping, chasing, running, wrestling, sniffing, swimming, hunting squirrels and pretty much ignoring me, but Nico barely gives them a second nod. I am his universe, which doesn't say much about his standards!

So today I forced myself to ignore him, cute antics and all. I decided to so bore him that he was compelled to look elsewhere for stimulation. And to my great delight he began to do just that...he glanced at the other dogs and showed some interest in what they were doing...almost as if something inside of him was being awakened. Lizzie noticed right away and tried to engage him in a bit of wrestling, which he seemed surprised about, but gave it his best shot, employing all his favorite leaping moves he uses to impress me. They weren't very effective, but Lizzie was being her gracious self and worked with his peculiar attempts at being a dog. Any attention from me immediately swept him back into his familiar role of leg warmer, so I had to repeatedly remove myself to keep the magic of his disconnection with me in motion. That's when it struck me.

That's exactly what I've needed to do with my newly launched daughter in her freshman year of college. Oh, I can return her phone calls, emails and text messages, but I need to restrain myself from initiating too many of them myself. Like Nico, I miss her cute antics and worth-inflating focus on me, but it is truly a delight to my soul to see her finding her own independence as she discovers her unique personhood. She is off and running, chasing, sniffing, wrestling and exploring the emerging young lady that she is! And despite my loss as the center of her universe, I want to keep the magic of this alive.

So, Nico, thank you for being my teacher today. We'll work on other dog skills tomorrow, but something tells me you are well on your way!